Problems with Paradigms

On one of my train journeys, I arrested a cop’s attention by not bribing a TT. Okay, call him a constable, Prakash Yadav. Our conversation took a turn after I acknowledged I was unmarried. It isn’t his fault that he thinks men have a right to philander and women don’t. Further, our decibels rose and he argued why a woman cannot love more than one man.

“Two? In succession,” I asked.

“Oh! She would be labelled a whore”

“What if she loved one but that doesn’t materialize and later settled in a beautiful relationship with another?”

It's a bogus question to even ask, most people who read this here would think. Sadly we form a miniscule percent of an ocean of thoughts.

“A boy and girl can never be friends” he slapped a cliché.

“Oh why not? I am friends with many girls. Girls whom I know are in a relationship”

“Not possible. You haven’t felt anything for them? Plus they’re cheating on their boys.”

“No.” I frowned.

“A girl should not befriend boys anyway”
My forehead lines deepened as I wondered to which era he belonged.
”You’ll allow your sister to befriend boys?”
And he mocked at my prompt yes as he got down at Mathura.

I collected myself; perhaps I was the only one in the entire compartment who was comfortable with the notion of a girl in boys’ companies and women in multiple relationships. A little off the paradigm.

How is it when you get stared at instead of being soothed, stigmatized when you should be sympathized? Well that’s how a victim of sexual assault sustains. Where a woman chief minister says a rape victim has concocted a story, while the police divulge the name of another woman for her to face further harassment. The regular argument would be rhetoric. Yes blame the woman’s liberation for the man’s uncontrolled libido.

But that’s the problematic play of paradigm. The question is, do you feel embarrassed when you’re robbed off? Or when you’re diagnosed of cancer? Or even when one passes away? It’s all tragic. Then why humiliate a rape victim, embarrassing her for her tragic accident?

How would it be had we all accepted women as men, and realized their right to love?

How would it be had we all grown up condoling a rape victim, helping her forgo the trauma and point our stares and stigmas on the culprit? 

Have you ever wondered why we pray to the Gods?
The discussions and arguments would be incessant. Theists, atheists and to top them all, people like me, agnostics. Contemplate the idea of God without man. From where has He come? Religion – a set of righteous rules, gone horribly wrong, being the sole reason for much enmity and bloodshed across the planet? So follow any all or none. God or divine presence is the ultimate solace for many, someone or some belief that someone is forever there by their side, guiding them.

If the man means no harm and upholds morals, what good is religion to him if he’s happy like that? Ah! With such paradigmatic disgust we question him.

How would it be had we all acknowledged that not all follow our faith and have a right to think different, be different without being scorned at or forced?

How would it be had we all been comfortable with the ones in faith and with their beliefs, greeting their Gods if they wished at times, without a mock?

How would it be?

Our societies have been fixed in thought. And it takes more than many lifetimes to move the paradigm. Why should an introvert be pushed into talking more and socializing more, when he/she is equally or even more capable, efficient or good? Even as the ‘Satan in the child’ lore having been discarded centuries ago, mothers force their left handed kids into right handedness, a paradigm shift into accepting homosexuality is a far fetched reality. A trait observed in many species apart from humans, being perfectly natural for it occurs naturally in some as part of nature’s diversity would wait with its stuck up believes for some considerable time.

How would it be had we all been open to think the other way?
How would it be had we all never fallen into paradigm in the first place?